Beautiful Mistake {Zi/J'dol}

[Wish]

The dragoness lifted her head, looking at him struggle for a moment or two. Well, at least he was having a hard time with this too, that made her feel somewhat better at least. Her rider was suffering, it only made sense to the dragoness that the cause of that suffering be there along with Her's. At his words however, she stopped her mental musings and blinked her faceted eyes a few times. You know she loves you too...J'dol... It was odd to say his name, but here she figured he had deserved it. It was good that he had finally admitted that something was wrong.

She is torn, she knows how much this will change her life, as much as she may want it. She knows she could lose you if she tried to push too hard. Mine has been through a lot in the past turn, as we all have been. You have changed, but to her that change is both a blessing....and a curse. She worries that by loving you she has forced you to become something against your will, and now again the same thought is there. Not to mention the fact that you just reminded her that she will have to change how she lives as well. It is adjustment all around.....and it scares her because she doesn't want to go through it alone, and she doesn't want to make the choice to not go through it. Besides, I won't allow it....not while there is a part of her that wants to grow up.

Her wings fluttered as she curled up and then out again, stretching her neck and tail until she was able to wind herself around him loosely. Her voice had been fairly even, the gentle temperament that Ara should have had all along she supposed. She's coming back soon, but only if you wish her to.

[Zirin]

He lifted his head in confusion. Had Avirith just... used his name? She never used his name! It was mildly unnerving, enough to make his mental tirade stop. Oh you'll stop for her but not for me? J'dol grimaced at his topaz, annoyed at her for once. She's being helpful. Tend your eggs and I'll be down to you soon.. He listened to the green, taking a strange sort of comfort from the calm words. Was this what being bonded to Avirith was like? It was such a difference from Kayath...

"She could never force me Avirith... I do it because I want to, I want her to be happy..." He sighed, "Not that I'm doing a very good job am I...?" In fact, if today was any indication then he was sure he was doing a terrible job of making her happy. He could understand the fear of change though, he had it himself constantly. It was the particular change that was confusing him.

"I only suggested a wing change... they happen all the time, why did she get so upset?" She would rarely be flying in the wings anyways; she'd be with the weyrlings until she was far enough along to need to stay indoors. That was something that wouldn't happen for a long while anyways. Besides, truth be told he rather liked the idea of keeping his eyes on her in the wing. Oh no... was that selfish of him?

"I'll drag her back if I have to, you know," He half joked. He'd never force her to stay with him, but he wasn't going to let her avoid him either. He froze as she wound herself around him, at first thinking she was going to snap and hurt him instead. When she didn't, J'dol placed a tentative hand on her hide, leaning into her until his forehead rested against her hide. "I'm sorry, you know... for causing you - both of you - so much trouble..."

[Wish]

...you really don't understand do you? Kayath'sOwn, she didn't know that she could still teach them. She feels important and useful when we can help in that way, and she knew she wouldn't be able to fly Fall for a while like this, so the idea that both would leave her...Mine did not want to feel like a burden on anyone. Silly thing.

The Green flicked her tail, her eyes whirling gently as she watched the other rider. So much that was unsaid between them, so much that was left in their minds alone. It was a shame that Hers could never tell him everything, but scars like those didn't heal easily or enjoy being pulled open either. J..J'dol...there is much you do not know or understand from when we were gone...so much that she has not told you. So much, that she will never tell you, but it has changed her. She doesn't like feeling helpless, she doesn't like not knowing what she's going to do, before she could tolerate it, now it is something she fears. I will not explain, and she will not either, but just know that the Mine you see....she is the only bit of the older rider I used to have.

That was the only thing the Green would give him, ominous as it may be. The young man perhaps deserved to know what they had made Hers do, but Hers did not deserve the punishment for it when she never made good on her job in the first place. There would be a price to pay for that later, but now was not the time...or perhaps this was the price being paid. Either way, the dragoness would never speak exactly of it, not to him. She is still with Rhoanth'sOwn. She will not leave, her mother won't let her. Rhoanth's is blaming you...again.

[Zirin]

J’dol grimaced. He supposed her reasoning made sense now, but why couldn’t she just tell him that she wanted to continue teaching instead of losing it like she had? She might not have been forced to run out of the room if he had just been told that. Shards, they needed to learn how to talk these things through! His eyes narrowed at the green’s next words however.

“She shouldn’t have to keep anything from me. I may not particularly like the Rebellion, but I support their cause. There shouldn’t be anything she can’t tell me.” In fact, the idea that she was purposely hiding things from him was oddly upsetting. Perhaps it was because he had, more or less, told her everything. Well, he hadn’t gone into detail about his mother issues, but she knew most of his story anyways.

“That spunky woman is letting herself be kept there?” He rolled his eyes. Great, one more thing he didn’t need to deal with; Aerinne! He didn’t really know her, but he had heard often enough that she apparently hated him. “Take me to her.” He finally said after a moment’s thought before remembering that Avirith wouldn’t necessarily take him just because he told her to. “Or show me where that woman’s sharding weyr is. Please.” He may not have wanted to deal with anything at the moment, but he had a duty to ‘rescue’ his weyrmate.

[Wish]

Not even if it's something that gives her nightmares? She learned to fight because she had to....those are not pleasant memories all the time.

The Green had grown quiet and somber by now, and at least she told a half truth of what Hers had had to do. There was more, so much more, like that they had been told to collect info and recruits as soon as the Knights had found that they were here and Hers was close to J'dol again. She had not said yes or no, simply refused to answer and let them assume as they wished. It had been a long week then, a very long week. Come, I will take you. Rhoanth's is not going to be happy though. She slipped down against the floor, waiting for him to climb onto her neck and shoulders, not entirely happy with letting another person ride her but still trusting the young man enough for it to be possible.

--

"Aerinne, I don't know what to do...I just, what if he....I probably should just stay here for some time right?" Ara sighed, her head sinking down as the green flit in her hands chirped and licked her nose. "He's going to kill me when he sees what you did...mom." The older greenrider simply shrugged and picked up her skirt a bit, folding on leg over the other where she was sitting. "So? Let him be mad my darling girl, I taught you how to deal with men Alyara. You'll be fine. Besides, she was meant for me."

Sighing again Ara nodded her head and looked at the pale newborn in her hands. Her mother had been just watching a flit egg she had bought hatch when she had come in. Now apparently it was all "meant to be" since it was such a "good occasion." Rolling her eyes at the memory of her foster mother's words the younger rider flopped onto the bed and curled up. "Now don't you go cryin' again girl. You're face is already a mess and red all over from what that boy done to you. Besides, this ain't your daughter's fault. That is something to celebrate! 'bout time you had one, most greenriders do and..." "Mom shut up!"

Aerinne scowled at the younger rider and folded her arms. "Young lady why I..." "No, I don't care! Just don't...please...." Sighing the older woman shook her head and went to the bed, wrapping her arms around Alyara and petting her head. "Don't you worry my pet, you baby girl and you are going to be just fine." She nodded her head to her "mother's" words, then stopped suddenly. "Wait...what makes you think it's a girl." Aerinne simply raised an eye brow and snorted. "Well, I'd hope it is. Boys are just trouble. Girl..girl is much better now."

[Zirin]

To be honest, he was completely surprised that Avirith would consent to carrying him. He had always assumed Avirith wouldn't even really let him near her, ON her had seemed such a forbidden idea that his initial step towards her was tentative at best. When she seemed to be willing though, he shuffled the rest of the way over and threw himself up onto her neck, taking a moment to adjust to how much smaller than Kayath she was. It felt weird, it felt wrong, and he knew he'd never ride any dragon but Kayath after this if he could help it.

"Thank you, Avirith." He gave the green's neck a gentle stroke, thankful that she cared for her rider so much.

---

The ride over had been full of mental tirades on how he would burst into the weyr and rescue his damsel. He was proud, he was confident, he was the Weyrlord! He could do what he wanted! Yet, now that he was actually on the ledge, listening to the voices inside, he felt all his resolve melting away. What if Ara would rather stay here? What if he was passing some sort of boundary he wasn't supposed to pass. No, he needed to do this! Taking a deep breath and throwing back his shoulders he marched into the room, took one look at what was going on, and felt that confident, proud resolve disappear.

"Can I have my weyrmate back now?" He glanced at Ara, not noticing the flit in her arms. Except for the fact she looked like she had cried more she seemed to be in one piece. "Please?"

[Wish]

Avirith, what in The Great Gold's name are you doing here? I told you definitely not to bring him! You were to keep him away.
Hush Rhoanth, I'm doing what is best for Mine, and right now she needs her Champion.
She needs her clutchmother!
Don't patronize me Rhoanth! I know what is best for Mine!

It had become a shouting match between the two almost, letting all in the room listen in without a care in the world. Besides the mental battle of wills each green was hunkered low, hissing, tails lashing and eyes whirling red. "Avirith!" "Rhoanth!" The two riders snapped out the names of their bondeds simultaneously, each pulling on their dragoness' will until they quieted and their eyes had dulled to a mere orange and blue mixture.

If she was here though that meant J'dol was too, and not even two seconds after that thought crossed Ara's mind did he come strolling through the room's entrance. Aerinne was the one to talk first between the two though, her own shoulders straightening as she cast a scrutinizing look at the Topazrider. Up. Down. Up again, and back to his eyes. "Well....you certainly chose a looker didn't you my sweet?" She tickled Alyara under her chin, making the girl blush and pull her head back, her mind fighting with her mouth to form the words she wanted to say.

Again though the other greenrider beat her to it, getting off the bed and walking over to the young man. Doing a slow circle around him she put a hand to her cheek an indifferent noise. "What was it you saw in him again my dear? You could do better I'm sure, certainly not someone that takes you away from your own mother only to send you back crying. I will give you that at least though Weyrlord....she did come back." Ara only looked at her hands, unable to say anything, only listen. Chirping the green on her lap watched the other two riders with a hint of curiosity, only held back by the Gold who was still curled around Ara's shoulders and the young blue who was sitting next to her.

"Easy Aries...Bayi it's okay...Stella, please." She put a hand on each as she said their name; controlling the hissing gold, calming the uncertain blue, and keeping the curious green on her lap.

[Zirin]

J'dol loved having eyes on him, he lived for attention, but the way this woman was looking him over was entirely unnerving. He had never felt so.. naked before, like she was seeing every detail despite the fact he was (for once) full clothed. He grin confidently at the complement, brief as it was, before feeling entirely uncomfortable all over again. She was judging him in a way he had never been judged before. Normally, in such a situation he might have simply ignored the issue and gone on his merry way. But this was Ara's 'mother'. He needed her approval. Even still, he had never felt so torn apart as he did now.

"I don't... I didn't..." He grimaced. Wow, getting a word in with this woman was an impossible task. No wonder Ara was so good at rambling! He tried to come up with something to say to Aerinne but the woman had managed to render him almost speechless. He glanced between the two greenriders for a moment before finally finding words to say.

"Of course she could do better than me. I don't deserve someone as perfect as she is. I..." He paused and looked at Ara, first noticing the new flit before glancing higher, hoping to meet her eyes. He wasn't ready for a kid, or for the commitment it would bring. He wasn't ready to step up to that roll just yet, but there was plently of time for that. He did know what thing he was ready for: taking her back. "I love you. Come home with me... please?"

[Wish]

"Well, how good of you to notice...." She looked at him for a moment, listening to him, the tone...everything. "I love you. Come home with me... please?" Smiling softly Aerinne nodded her head. Good, he finally might be getting it. This was up to her little girl now, and she stood back somewhat so that Alyara would understand just that. This was her choice, her play, her move. There was nothing anymore that she could do to change the girl's mind, or did she want to. From here on out, her baby girl was going to have to act like an adult, or come back and do something even harder.

Ara meanwhile had just stared at her hands and the flits, not even looking up to look at J'dol. She couldn't, if she did, she might start crying or do something worse. What she needed...Faranth! She didn't even know what she needed anymore! Her eyes stung from the dried up tears, her cheeks feeling sticky from where they had trailed down her eyes. Home... Was that what he was offering her? A home? When had been the last time she had felt like she had truly had that, a place to call home. He had even called her his weyrmate, not girlfriend, but weyrmate. He loved her.

Slowly, partly from hesitation, and partly from not wanting to scare the newborn green, Ara stood up and wobbled as Stella clambered onto her arms and curled up there chirping. Aries hissed but flew on her own, knowing it was far better to do that right now than to weigh Hers down with a billion of flit pounds from the trio. Bayi likewise wanted to be the hero and puffed out his chest, sniffing with his head thrown back as he chirped at Aries to fly near him, he would protect her from the evil man. Naturally the Gold flocked to her little suitor and trilled.

Alyara still hadn't actually taken a step though, in fact she just stood there, her teeth nibbling at her lower lip and her hands trembling. Her eyes slid over to her...to her mother, yes because that was exactly what she needed in this moment. All in a matter of minutes she had turned from a full grown woman to a child once again, and she needed that reassurance that only a mother could give her. Aerinne nodded, slightly, barely noticeable. It was enough for Ara. She didn't walk, she didn't stride, she didn't even just take a few hesitant steps at a time.

She ran...right into his arms.

"I love you....I...I love you."

Well what did you know, apparently she wasn't quite done crying yet.

[Zirin]

There were plenty of things J'dol had expected to happen, cold dismissal being one of them. Truth be told, the fact Aerinne just stepped back like that had him, well, speechless. He shot her a surprised and mildly wary look, as if not quite trusting that she was just going to let him do as he wanted. He watched Ara, not sure if he was supposed to take a step towards her. He couldn't force her, wouldn't force her. Not now.

He stumbled back a step as she ran full force into him, instinctively wrapping his arms around her as tight as he dared, shocked to feel the wetness of more tears. Oh shards, had he messed up again? Was it his fault she was crying again. He glanced at Aerinne, for a moment showing how unsure he was before nuzzling into Ara's neck.

"I love you Ara, you and only you. Don't ever forget that." He whispered, not wanting her mother to hear. "But I would really, really like to get out of here. Your mother terrifies me..." He glanced warily at the other greenrider, still feeling like he was being watched.

[Wish]

Alyara chuckled softly, a strange sort of sound that was half choked considering the fact that she was hiccuping around her tears as well. "Yeah..she scares me sometimes too." Her arms hugged him as close as she could possibly get him to come to her, and she let her head rest against his shoulder for a moment, forgetting everything but the feel of him against her and the comfort it brought. "Let's go then." Pulling away slightly the greenrider looked at the older woman who she had been raised by, and the two in that moment simply stared at the other, and frozen in their places they could have easily been mistaken for blood.

Just as quickly as that realization washed over Ara though, she shook it off. She might have needed Aerinne's support, but now that support was done with and she had to stand on her own two feet. Her eyes flickered over to Avirith's form and J'dol's nearby. Okay, so not entirely by herself she didn't. "Come on...let's go home." She repeated herself, hesitant somewhat and soft, but her hand stretching to take her weyrmate's in it's barely concealed trembling. Would it change things between them all? Yes. However, change was not always a bad thing as they had found out, and it was simply one more thing to become accustomed to.

(Sowwy, it's short. >.<)